Samplings of my life...

A person should never state that they are bored. If they do, there are two probable issues. One, that person does not have enough work to do. Two, that person is tragically devoid of imagination. For instance, I spend 9 long hours a day alone. In a house. That is lacking proper supervision. I busy myself by chasing off real and imagined passersby. I sleep. And I discover ways to torment those I live with.

One day, it was going to freeze. Alpha Pants brought in three luscious potted plants to protect them from the elements. I busied myself in "dead-heading" them and pruning them all day. I made sure to leave my evidence deposited throughout the house, so that Alpha Pants would not have to come home from work and think, "Whatever shall I do with my evening?"

Another day, I discovered a bedroom door left open. I will plead the fifth on what occurred, but I can report that 17 Webkinz stuffed animals were left in a trail from the entryway, through the living room, up the stairs, and throughout the game room for the children's picking-up pleasure. I have enjoyed listening to many conversations on what I could possibly have been up to.

They will never know.

Unfortunately, Alpha Pants children are quite good at amusing themselves as well. They have recently discovered their own form of "payback" for my household activities. The humiliating image accompanying this post is all the explanation you need.